Published: Thu, July 1, 2010
Updated: Thu, July 1, 2010
A new study released this summer titled My Daddy’s Name is Donor, conducted in part by UT sociology professor Dr. Norval Glenn, has found that kids conceived with donor sperm have serious questions about their biological father and their own identity.
The study compared opinions about donor conception, personal well-being and family relationships of donor-conceived adults, to those who were adopted or raised by their biological parents.
According to the results, 65 percent of donor offspring agree with the statement “my sperm donor is half of who I am,” rather than just a means of creation.
“People try to use language that separates the biological tie,” said Alana Sveta, 23, a musician and activist for donor-conceived rights, “but he’s not just a sperm donor, he’s my father.” Sveta was conceived with a donor.
Some countries, like the United Kingdom and Sweden, ban anonymous sperm donation. In the United States, a list of features and characteristics about the donor are provided, as well as the promise that the donor and his sperm have been checked for medical issues, unless the receiver specifically requests a donor who did not donate anonymously.
“We keep tabs and current address information,” said Xytex Cryo International Representative Eric Dos, about open-donors, “but it’s the child’s responsibility to track them down.”
Anonymity as the norm seems to go against the wishes of most donor conceived people though, with 67 percent of donor conceived people saying they feel that they have the right to know the identity of the donor and 63 percent saying they should have the right to form a relationship with him, according to the study.
Donor conceived people also expressed the desire to know more about their roots beyond the donor, with 70 percent agreeing that they wonder what their sperm donor’s family is like. Fifty-three percent said that it hurts them when they hear other people talk about their genealogical background.
“You know how it is in America,” said Sveta. “Everyone asks what your background is. It’s a really painful question.”
Sveta obtained a more extended profile of her donor three years ago and learned that he is Polish-American. It is an identity that she has embraced wholeheartedly, changing her last name from Stuart to Sveta to sound more Slavic and traveling to Poland to get a sense of her heritage. “I really clung to the Polish thing,” she said.
The question of heritage is a trait that people who were adopted share with donor-conceived people, with 66 percent of adoptees saying they wish they knew more about their ethnic background.
However, donor-conceived offspring in the study always showed higher levels of confusion and distrust within their families. For example, 47 percent said that they think their mother might have lied to them about important things while growing up compared to the 27 percent of adopted people and 18 percent of biological offspring.
Dos said that he found the article interesting but is wary of associating certain traits with donor children as a group. “There is no rhyme or reason why someone grows up a certain way,” Dos said. “It depends on your support system at home and outside.”
Sveta on the other hand believes that problems can stem from donor offspring feeling unable to ask questions concerning their conception with their parent. Sveta is not alone, with 53 percent of donor-conceived people saying they worry they will hurt their parents if they bring up the topic.
“It’s an extremely isolating experience, because you can’t talk to your parents if you’re unhappy,” said Sveta. “The biological parent is a source of pain for them.”
Although it was not researched in the study, both Glenn and Sveta said that they thought that donor-conceived people would be somewhat better off if the amount of oversight in the adoption process was applicable to sperm donation.
“The regulation in adoption is helpful [in finding good homes for kids], with the bureaucracy and the counselors and infrastructure,” said Sveta. “With donor conception, if you have the money to do it, you have a kid.”
Despite the fact that 47 percent of donor-conceived offspring have concerns about donor conception and can recount specific difficulties that came with being a donor child, 61 percent said they support the technology. Twenty percent have even donated their own eggs, sperm or served as a surrogate mother, compared to the 0 percent adoptees and 1 percent biological children.
However, of those that feel less amiable about the practice, only 46 percent say they can’t express their views to society at large.
“It’s a responsibility for me to raise donor conception issues,” Sveta said about the theme of donor conception in her music. “A lot of donor conception kids don’t have the right to speak their own truth; they don’t have the right to stand up for themselves. I know I’m hitting on a truth here with people.”
Despite Sveta’s opinions about the ethics of donor conception, she herself has donated her eggs in order to earn money, though she said she has some regrets about and will never undertake the procedure again. “I feel like I sold my first born child,” Sveta said, whose eggs have produced two children. “I look forward to the day my kids come to find me.”
My Daddy’s Name is Donor was funded by the Institute for American Values and has yet to be peer-reviewed. This study is the first of it’s kind; more research is needed before definitive conclusions can be drawn. To see the study, click here: http://familyscholars.org/
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